An ACCA story

8:00 AM

Brrrrrrrrrringgggggggggggg

F1: Goooooood morning everyone, another day, another thousand students to torture.

P4: Lol, look who’s talking. How are you gonna torture ANYONE F1? Whaddaya gonna do? Tell me
business structures till I die? LOL!! Learn the art of torture from me boys.

P2: For God’s sake P4! It’s just the start of the day and already you’re at it.

P4: Shut yer trap, Capiche?

F7: OYE! You can’t talk to my dad like that!!

P4: Ohh yeah, now I’m scared. Ohhhh save me!! P2 and F7 will murder me with their IAS’s. Tell ya what, why don’t you go consolidate a few balance sheets and leave me alone, eh?

F2: Calm down P4, please. Keep peace.

*P4 punches F2 in the gut*

P4: Come back after you calculate the pain per blood cell in your belly, aite?

F5: Lol and after you’re done I’ll let you know the variance!!

*P4 slaps F5*

P5: OYE!! What did you do that for?????

P4: Sue me!

F4: Ohhh he just might!

*P4 slaps F4 too*

F4: You TORTurous son of a…..(slap)

*F3 enters*

F3: Whoooo wants breakfast?

F9: Just some LIBOR please…

P4: I want Options, a few Futures and a glass of WACC. These guys have ruined my mood.



10:00 AM

F6: Dad, I heard some noise in the morning today. Something wrong?

P6: Naah son, it’s just your uncle P4 exercising his anger venting options.

P7: This can’t go on P6, it just can’t. I can see my family breaking up because of P4.

P1: I could maybe do something about it? Teach him some ethics…anything?

P6: *Scoffs* Yeah, like anyone listens to YOU of all the people. Enron ring a bell?

P1: Heyy! Not Fair! I wasn’t there when it happened!

F8: Welcome to the club uncle P1.

P7: Son, go do your homework.

*F8 goes to his room*

P6: Sigh, I just wish P4 could be more like F9. He’s just so kind in nature as compared to his father. A
shame.

P7: He will change brother, one day he will.

6:00 PM

F3: Has anyone seen my iPod? I can’t find it anywhere.

P4: I for sure haven’t. Maybe P3 has it, the guy gets a kick outta analyzing things, and people.

P3: Funny, coming from someone who keeps analyzing the stock exchange so much that he lives his life off it.

P4: Oooo, someone seems to have ANALYZED my LIFECYCLE!!

P3: HEDGE YOU P4, HEDGE YOU!

P4: Stop shoutin’, or else you’ll need a major re-engineering.

8:00 PM

P7: P4, I am sick and tired of your daily antics. Why do you have to be so angry? If you have issues, talk
them out.

P4: I…no issues. I don’t have any goddamn issues.

P7: Come on, I’m your brother, you can tell me. Come on, let it out.

P4: I….*sigh*…

P7: Go on…

P4 (sobbing a little): You all have it easy. I’m the hated one. Everyone hates me. I don’t know why. I’m a
good guy on the inside, but…..but nobody just seems to understand me. (crying)

P7: I know the feeling my brother, trust me. You see, you must really change yourself if you want people to
understand you. Look at me, I keep a good image on the outside, though I’m quite a tough old nut on the inside. But you, and me, and everyone else are a part of this family, we must not fight among ourselves.

P4: I’m not the one who started it, P3 and P5 have been fighting within themselves, you just don’t see it.

P7: Don't worry, I'll do something. But are you feeling better?

P4: I guess so...maybe...

P7: Look you don't have to SPECULATE. Tell me surely, feeling better?

P4: I can't be certain...

P7: *facepalm* Fine, I'll ASSUME you're feeling better.

10:00 PM

(At the dinner table)

P7: P3, I have been told that you and P5 have had some….conflicts? Is this true?

P3 : Well…yes…

P5: Well…its more of my fault…I sometimes go to P3’s room, and steal stuff… :$ I’m sorry..but I can’t help
it either…

P7: Why not?

P5: Well…my room is incomplete without his stuff..

P7: ???

P5: Let’s just say that if I stopped stealing stuff from his room, I wouldn’t really be a part of this family
anymore.

P7: come on P5, it can’t be THAT bad..?

P5 (getting uncomfy and a tad irritated): Look, can we just eat and go to sleep? Our conflict will remain
and you can’t do anything about it, get it? Don’t make me open my mouth or else nasty secrets will come out.

P7: WHAT…DO YOU MEAN..?

P5 (drops his spoon and fork in anger): Alrighty, seems some people won’t be sleeping easy tonight. F1,
F2 and F3, nobody really cares about you here, whether you stay, or don’t. Nobody gives a damn. You 3 can even be ignored completely. F4, you are an illegitimate child of P1 and Law, you are not a real part of this family (F4’s eyes well up with tears, he goes to his room). F6, you are not the only one of your kind. There are some like you in many places. People can ignore you for them if they choose to. Same goes for you F7 and P2, F8, even you. F9, you are not much like your dad, you should be ashamed of having a father like P4, nobody likes him, everyone hates him. P6 and P7, I don’t want to say anything against you two, purely for the little bit of respect I have for you as my elder brothers. Do not test my patience any further.

P7:…this family will….will never be the same after tonight….

P5: The hell it won’t, its 2011, changes WILL happen.

P6: What do you mean??

P5:They are going to revise us. And they are going to put the CAT down…

P7 (wells up with tears): No, not the CAT surely :S

P5: I’m afraid so…

*Entire table in depression after this news*

P7 (after gaining composure): Who told you all this P5?

P5: Google.

(F.R.I.E.N.D.S Theme Tune at the End)


;) hope you enjoyed.